Thursday, June 9, 2011

Going through the motions

Today is really of those days where you don't want to move because the slightest movement can cause you to burst into sweat. The heat also seems to dampen my motivation, though to be honest it's been pretty damp lately anyway. My mini boost has worn off; most days I find myself just wondering what to do with myself. It's not like there's a lack of things I can do - draw, write, paint, play video games, read, bake, go out somewhere,'s just that I don't have much desire to do any of those things. I think I've run out of fuel a little; I've spent months working hard and plowing through various creative processes, for the love of it yes, but also in the hopes of reaping a little reward, but so far I am unsatisfied with where I am. Discouragement is only natural, I know, but man do I hate it. With my writing, I feel like I'm playing in a shallow pool of water...only flitting around with things but not getting anywhere deeper. I went for reading books in rapid fire to hardly reading....I did finish City of Fallen Angels and have started Fire, but my reading speed has slowed considerably none the less. New ideas for stories are few and far between...when they come I get excited about them for literally a day...then they fade out. Discouraging.

I'm going through the motions....wondering where I am in my life, how I got here, and where do I go now. I hate feeling like time is just passing me by, but that's sort of how I feel right now. I need a kick, some inspiration, some motivation...something to spark me to continue moving forward with the things I want to achieve. I think the only thing that would really work would be for some Really Good Thing to happen for me right now, then I'd regain myself and be more certain that success is in my reach. I know I am the only one who can make things happen for myself...but for now...I'm just sitting in a shallow pool.


  1. Oh, I hate this feeling when it creeps up. So you've tried readign and it still doesn't help? That is usually something that gets my spark back if I read something really really good. What about heading over to some debut authors blogs? That always helps me too or maybe it is something about your wip that is causing you to get stuck. I'm not sure where you are in that process so I could be totally off on that.
    You did sign up for the blogfest, maybe connecting with like minded writers will get you pumped up again.

    I hope something works:) It is the worst feeling to just tread water:(

  2. Oh, I'd love to follow you but didn't see the GFC button anywhere?

  3. I definitely look forward to connecting with other authors, I was very happy to come across your blogfest! I've actually started reading again and though I still am not writing anything as yet I think some of the gloom is wearing off.

    Thanks for stopping by my blog, I've added the GFC button now =)